It has been months since I have written a blog, probably because I feel like there is no encouragement in what has been going on in these last few months. Today I saw that that is a lie from Satan. My new goal is to write at least once a week in order to keep myself on track of having at least one time of day where I stop and journal what God is doing in my life. I am about to get real honest up in here so if you read to judge me this is a good one to rub in my face later.
Facts
1. At times I am self centered and heartless.
In these last months there have been times when the Lord needed me to get up out of bed to do work for the kingdom and I said no. I have let my own sin and the sin of others keep me wrapped in my covers and saying no to the God that cut my chains free. I ran from responsibility because things haven't worked as I have planned and I have thrown the towel in when what I needed to do is simple. You who fear the LORD, thrust in the Lord; He is their help and their shield. Ps 115:11 I never trusted in the Lord to seek the truth in those situations. I let Satan tell me what was up and never went after the truth. Prayer. Pray Pray Pray and Pray some more. Come all who are weary and heavy laden and I will give you rest. I am learning that the Word of God is no job. When you bring your selfishness to Him you will be released from it. Not that I am perfect at this but He is working in me on this.
2. Hard times don't mean God is not there.
In these last months my family has been recked, my brother is in prison, my sister lost her job and is struggling with addition and my mom is ........ and I am trying to hold it all together. I have been having money problems like no bodies business and I worry about this the bible clearly says not to. I freak out, and panic over random things and never do I ask God to take it or to just hold me in the storm. For this reason I say to you, do not be worried about your life, as to what you will eat or what you will drink; nor for your body, as to what you will put on. Is not life more than food, and the body more than clothing? Mt 6:25 Every time I got to my last dollar the Lord has blessed me with some way to get food or to pay a bill. He is never going to leave you once He is with you. Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. Phil 4:6 I am learning to cling to God with all me and to trust Him. Trusting Him in the hard times is the hardest thing I have ever tried to do. He will honor the request you make if you truly are on good terms with Him and tell Him each and every little thing.
3. Be open with others
People can't help, people can't care and no one will ever know how to love you if you never let them in. Therefore, confess your sins to one another, and pray for one another so that you may be healed. The effective prayer of a righteous man can accomplish much. James 5:16 I'm a private person and when I am hurting all I want to do is run and shut the door. I honestly can say I am not truly open with many people but there is a few that I have let in and I believe it is on to have those people who you can go to with anything. The people who will pray with you, pray for you and love you no matter what is going on. Trust people and love people but be there for them too.
That is just one or two pages from my journal but I will keep posting. Pray and Love more than ever!
